I want to step into the future and leave my memories behind.
Why must I take with me the pain and eventually lose my mind?
When my thoughts become too much; a burden I cannot bear,
can my memories be erased? My desire is not to care.
They attack me night and day, leaving scars and scabs of thought.
Hopelessly engulfed; in memory’s web I’m trapped and caught.
Reflections of a tortured mind; subliminal reverie,
no nightmare can compete with my painful reality.
I am chased by a haunting specter of an unrelenting fiend.
No succubus in my dreams on which this demon can be weaned.
Afraid to close my eyes, those mirrors into my soul,
and my every thought and memory, an ugly shriveled troll.
No good did ever cleave to me, my deeds will never shine.
I worshipped at ole evil’s feet and kissed the devil’s shrine.
Regrets were never mine to know; in crassness, born and bred,
and to those whose paths I crossed; their screams pound in my head.
From memories, I must be set free and confine them to a tomb.
Or settle down to await rebirth as my thoughts bespeak my doom.
Shelby I. Courtland
© 2013 Shelby I. Courtland