‘A Child Was Born In Bethlehem’

The greatest story ever told

A child was born in Bethlehem, let all the world rejoice.
Go sing the songs of ancient lands; lift each and every voice.

A silent night, a holy night and peace did fill the earth.
We celebrate the dawn of the Christ child’s virgin birth.

Jesus was a poor man who healed the sick and broken.
“Blessed are the meek,” and truer words were never spoken.

He spoke of good Samaritans who should never turn away.
The good book tells his story, but is it how we live today?

No truth outlived his prophecy as he died to save us all.
And though we preach his word, we slither and we crawl.

Not unlike the snake that made Eve and Adam sin,
we turn our back on God and we listen to the jinn.

The Christians say they speak God’s truth and love their fellow man.
They lie, they cheat and steal and their greed; they’ll never ban.

Those who worship idols shall never see the Promised Land.
The Christians do not heed their loving God’s command.

Hypocrites and heathens are not bound for Paradise.
Fool yourself to death with your love of every vice.

Speak not to me for what I see are those whose lies grow bold.
And I will keep my distance from the christian’s evil fold.

Written by,
Shelby I. Courtland
© 2013 Shelby I. Courtland

16 thoughts on “‘A Child Was Born In Bethlehem’

    1. Apparently, they must have left a bad taste in the lion’s mouth, for the lion began to spit them out and woe be unto us since they walk amongst us in droves. If only the lions had had a serious taste for flaming potato flavored liars, heathen powdered biscuits and hypocrite-flavored snake venom, we would not have this problem today. The lions must have had some vile and foul shit after digesting that nasty christian flavored mess.

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      1. Shelby, I’ve always wondered about that! Did those ancient christians really taste all that bad (obviously our modern ones are in extremely poor taste, if that’s the same thing) or were there simply not enough lions to do the job? – Linda

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  1. I thought I was gonna have to send someone over there and have you checked for fever.

    You put it so sweet, much like they do. The only thing is where they zigged you zagged and pulled me right back in.

    Thank you for restoring my faith in the all is not lost.

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    1. Bite YOUR tongue, man, bite your tongue. How could you have doubted me for a nanosecond as much as I have let it be known just what I think of ‘christians’! I decided that since I am so obvious about my loathing of them that I would take the subtle approach. Works for me! LOL!!

      I am however, so sorry that for a mere second, I had you questioning my sanity or lack there of. No need, I assure you that I have not completely lost it, though many try my patience and my penchant for kindness is sometimes mistaken for weakness and rather quickly rectified, I might add.

      You are quite welcome and as you can see, all is not lost yet. And you take care of your self. And I mean that! Or I am going to come looking for you!

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      1. Okay okay okay.

        You have been redeemed in the eyes of the lord my child, now go forth and carry my words. Carry my words to the poor, the hungry, the sick, the shut in, the downtrodden, the heavy laden.

        Oh hell, do whatever you want child I gotta find the weed man.

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  2. Linda, the problem was that the ‘christians’ were sickening the lions and making them sterile and so the Romans just had to stop feeding ‘christians’ to the few remaining lions before that practice wiped out the entire lion population. ‘Christians’ do not go down easy. I don’t think that they would go down easy into the belly of their own ‘beast’! ‘Christians’ did give us something, vomit. But perhaps, I am being too hard on them. Naww, not really! LOL!

    Thanks Linda! And don’t forget. Don’t venture forth on ‘Skank’giving Day or SmackDown Friday. We don’t want you getting trampled.

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    1. Okay Shelby, that makes sense to me. The christians I know are certainly hard enough to swallow. But why is this not in our history books?

      And thanks for the warning — I could never outrun those brain-dead bargain hunters anyway, not while wearing my usual Crocs! Bah humbug. – Linda

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      1. BLACK FRIDAY ONLY: Your favorite Crocs, all colors …. 79 cents!
        At Tubularsock’s Emporium this Friday only between 3 AM and 3:10AM
        at the Croc Counter …….. limited quantity! First come first served no lay away available for this offer. As we say, “This is a lot of Croc”.

        Also be tempted by our vast stock of slave-labor products direct from Bangladesh. Where children enjoy their 150 hour work week.

        And as we say at Tubularsock’s Emporium: “A happy bottom line is our Christmas.”

        Buy now and Tubularsock’s Emporium with give .00000000000000000000000000000003% of your purchase price to the help the dead Panda fund.

        Don’t be late ……. all sales are final, nor refunds or exchanges.

        Christians eat FREE at our buffet : saltless soda crackers and Welch’s grape juice ……… full body and blood! How could you pass THAT by?

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      2. It is not in the history books because they refuse to let ME write them!! There is no real belief in that ‘the truth shall set you free’! We must be lied to and controlled by propaganda and what Christ spoke of in the ‘bible’ is in opposition to what we are actually doing. Christ said to help the poor, not turn your back on the poor. Jesus, himself, was a poor man and one whom I hardly think would be riding around in a $100,000 vehicle, while sexting with his smartphone and tearing up the earth that his Father created, stating, “drill baby, drill!” You see, the ‘christians’ are not practicing what they preach about Jesus Christ, who if he came here as a homeless man, would be met with contempt and be shunned. The ‘christians’ know that because they know that they are heartless money hungry heathens who wouldn’t recognize Jesus if he stood in front of them in all of his homeless tattered rags. This they know, but they are the ‘pretenders’, two-faced lying hypocrites who spout bullshit and worship money and material things.

        You are so right Linda! You do not want to get in the way of Little Johnny’s mommy. As she will knock down anyone in sight to get Little Johnny all that he screams for! LOL!

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  3. Wow — “79 cents for Crocs”? Get thee behind me Satan — I mean Tubularsock! You know I can resist anything except temptation! But no, it would never be worth it. And that buffet sounds … like it could destroy my will to live. Which is not always up to par this time of year anyway.

    Nice try though — you nearly got me! – Linda

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  4. Tube! Why aren’t you selling 18″ stiletto heels? You know that I lost my other pair! And soon, I am going to be ‘running with the bulls’ again and that is my favorite footwear for that.

    Oh hell naw! I’ll not be partaking of THAT buffet!! Free or not!!! Oh, but then, I’m not a ‘christian’ so that let’s me off the hook.

    Dead pandas? Were they fed ‘christians’ too? Damn!!!

    A 150 hour work week? Tube, you’re ALL heart!!

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    1. I’d be more than happy to send the rotten lot of them by UPS, same day delivery! Although, they should be headed for:
      666 Deepest Pit Of Hell
      c/o Demons and Devils
      Helland, Hell 666-666
      Attn: Do NOT return to sender!

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  5. I just had to post this as it so fits in with regards to making ONE of my points!

    http://usnews.nbcnews.com/_news/2013/11/29/21675617-the-congregation-was-besides-themselves-mormon-bishop-dresses-as-homeless-man-to-teach-flock-a-lesson?lite

    A Mormon bishop who wanted to teach his flock a lesson about charity went to the extreme and enlisted a Hollywood-style makeup artist to transform him into a scruffy vagrant who then panhandled outside his church.
    “The majority of the people just ignored me and went to great lengths not to make eye contact,”
    Those who had shunned Musselman came up and confessed their shame. One woman said she was going to tell her grown children to donate anything they bought her for the holidays to a homeless shelter.

    This bishop underwent a transformation, was made up to resemble a ‘homeless’ person and of course, was shunned by the majority of his own congregation. Am I surprised? Hell no! If I have said it once, I have said it a million times that if their oh so beloved Jesus Christ was to show up, looking just as this bishop looked when he got himself made up to resemble a homeless person, that Jesus would be shunned, just as this bishop of his own church was. And yet, those ‘christians’ sit up and listen to the ‘good’ word every Sunday and what ‘good’ does it do? I rest my fucking case!

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