I Am Such A Sentimental Fool!

sentimental3

“Shelby, I visited your blog and it is obvious from the posts that I read that you are a talented, sensitive and creative person. Such personalities often suffer the most from the injustice that is part of the human experience. I really believe that if you undertook the journey to understand exactly what capitalism is and how it works that you would see the world in an entirely different way. While I understand the passion that produces the rants that you write (I was once in the same place that you are), please understand that those you rail against do not hear you. The only person who suffers is you, not them. One of the many wise observations in the many varieties of 12 step programs is this one: “We may think we can change the things around us according to our desires, but when a solution does come, we find it was our desires that had changed.”

I’m sure you know the Serenity Prayer:

God, grant me the serenity to accept the things that I cannot change
The courage to change the things that I can
And the wisdom to know the difference.

It is unlikely that you will be able to change capitalism but if you understand what it is and how it works, I promise you that your desires will have changed. Will you still see injustice? Absolutely. But your reaction to injustice will change, perhaps in a way that will enable you to take some small steps to ameliorate a few instances of it.”

To my faithful followers, it would seem that I owe you all an apology. You have been reading the blog of a lunatic. Apparently, from the above comment, I suffer for my personality being what it is and for the fact that I have yet to undertake a journey into the world of capitalism to fully understand how it works. I am so extremely sorry that I failed to take this journey because if I had, I would not have posted so many rants that you have read that are, apparently, quite meaningless. I am railing at people who do not hear me and so it would seem that when I see injustice, I just need to make myself aware that I don’t understand capitalism and how it works and therefore, I am sensitive as opposed to hardened and so this must change. I must become cold and hard and dangerous and unfeeling, unkind, insensitive and I must become an asshole; a barbaric, selfish, self-serving brute that thinks only of my desires and to hell with the suffering of innocent human beings. I must understand capitalism and that there is nothing that I can do but recite the Serenity Prayer and by doing so, my ‘reaction to injustice will change’.

I should not post poems, excuse me, RANTS, because it has been brought to my attention that my ranting is pointless; they serve no useful purpose. My rants are only causing me undue anguish and are accomplishing nothing. I am wasting my time because I am not Mother Teresa. I am not Gandhi. I am not Rosa Parks. I am not Oprah Winfrey. I am not Donald Trump. I am not Barack Obama and so I must remain silent because no one cares if I speak or not. There is no one taking heed of what I say. Who am I? I am no one of importance. I am of no consequence. And I have personality issues that can only be resolved if I acknowledge that I do indeed, have these issues and take myself to the nearest group meeting, announce my name and proceed to talk about my need to have my ranting heard. I need to talk about the fact that I am nobody and yet, I am trying to get my voice heard when there is no one listening at all. I am a lunatic because I am sensitive. This I must tell the group that will accept the nobody that I am into a group of nobodies and after we have finished going around the group, hearing from each and every nobody, understanding that we should not rail against those that do not hear us, we shall then stand and hold hands and recite the Serenity Prayer. We are not drunks. We are not overeaters. We are not drug addicts. We are sensitivity addicts and for that, we must be deprogrammed. We must be desensitized. We should understand the capitalist system and disregard the system’s impact on our fellow human beings because only then can we harden our hearts to the drone struck. Only then can we forget about the refugees in Syria and Iraq and Afghanistan. Only then can we forget about the homeless tent cities in America. Only then can we forget that we have a heart and that that heart was once filled with love, sensitivity, compassion, sympathy, kindness and warmth. We should forget all of these things because we can do nothing about them, so being sensitive to them is pointless and counterproductive and our ‘reaction to injustice will change’.

We are not what this world needs. The world has too many of us in it and so one less is desirable. One less is a goal to strive for. One less deep and feeling soul is a blessing for this world. And for having one, I do apologize to my readers. It was never my intent to show you the pain I feel when I read of atrocities. It was never my intent to bombard you with my thoughtless ranting poetry that just showed the ugly side of my sensitivity. For that, again, I most sincerely apologize. I must embrace hatred and callousness. I must stop ranting because no one is listening and I just seem crazy and for that I must see if there is a group that I can join and find a god to hear me recite the Serenity Prayer. If I find that there is no such group, then I will take it upon myself to start one. But alas, is this too considered another issue I have, this fact of my need to start a group for nobodies? Quite obviously, I can’t win. I can’t be heard. I can’t rant. I can’t care. I can’t. I just can’t because those that I rail against don’t hear me and they will never understand my sensitivity. Oh, what a world!

In closing, regardless of what people may say, no one and I do mean NO ONE is going to stop me from ranting and raving or even railing against those that don’t hear me. I don’t care how much understanding of ‘capitalism’ I supposedly need. More understanding of capitalism is not what is needed; at least not in my book. The problem is that so few of us concern ourselves with the plight of others because if we did, we would not so carelessly and so callously ignore the suffering of others. I know that capitalism has run amok, but when I see the face of a child that died for no reason, when I see the face of a child that is a refugee because of bombs dropped in their homeland that was paid for by my tax dollars, you are goddamn right, I am going to rant and rave regardless of whether it does any good or not. No, I guess I’m not making a difference because I am not well-known nor am I on primetime or famous for having wardrobe malfunctions. But even if I sit in a little corner of the net and rant and rave and rail all by my lonesome, it is my call to make. If I am too sensitive for my own sake, so be it, but I refuse to try and turn it off like it is a faucet. I refuse to become an automaton. Nor will I recite some useless Serenity Prayer to a non-existent ‘god’ that if it did exist, we should not have to rant and rave and rail against all of this shit that is taking place, worldwide, to begin with!

What a sentimental fool am I! And I fully intend to remain so!

29 thoughts on “I Am Such A Sentimental Fool!

  1. We sensitive lot are sentimental fools, cheer up. You very well know that the great people you mentioned in this post they too had to pass through this phase which you are in now. So don’t give up, rave and rant as much and as louder as you can. Happy Friday and have wonderful weekend, Shelby dear. Hugs and love, rekhaaa

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    • Rekha, I cannot cheer up until I am in ‘group’ and then ‘group’ will help me cheer up because by listening to the other sad stories of the other ‘group’ members will I then feel better about my issues. Hearing other peoples issues always makes the listener feel better about his or her problems or so I’ve been told.

      But regardless, I thank you for your comment and hope that your weekend is wonderful as well.

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  2. Shelby, I’ve known you were a lunatic for a while now. I’m a lunatic too. And so is everyone who has broke away from the mainstream Android mentality, and our numbers are few. At least, that’s how them Lemmings see us; lunatics, oddballs, weirdos. And, btw, to understand capitalism you must understand slavery, for this is at its very foundation.

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    • Well Peter, I am in good company for I am quite sure that because you are vegan and have posted much on the plight of animals that are slaughtered for human consumption, you have most likely been called far worse. However, you do not let that stop you and you will not.

      I happen to like the company that I keep and if I seem to be on the path of change, if I seem to care less and less, if I seem to be too unconcerned about the suffering of animals and people, then ‘cyberly’ speaking, clonk me one upside the head and set me to rights again!

      And you are so right, to understand what capitalism is, is to know what it means to be a slave. How many of us are really and truly free? We are just as caged as the animals designated for slaughter are and in fact by the elite fucks that rule this planet, we are considered animals to be led to slaughter.

      I sincerely thank you for your comment!

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    • Thank you for posting the link and I’ve also reblogged it because it is a MUST READ!!

      I am a hysterically hysterical leftie’s leftie and damned proud of it!

      All the best to you Toritto! And I extend to you a cyber hand for a handshake on it!

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  3. The following portion is a reply to the person who commented, not Shelby:

    You are so deluded, so sad, whoever you are. AA/NA (’12 step’) is a mind-fuck for the unable to cope folks who must have a ‘support system’. I know, i tried it once. Worthless! And no, I am not a drug addict or alcoholic! Nor was I then, but people like you sure tried to convince me I was! And that’s what AA/NA is all about, isn’t it? Misery loves company!

    After you finish at the ten AA or NA meetings you attend, almost every day of the week, I bet you’re off to the system analysts, oops, I mean psycho-babblers, next, so you can be told what’s really wrong with you. And these psycho-babblers (drug-pushers in disguise) then get you hooked on LEGAL drugs to solve your non-existent psycho maladies, don’t they? It’s five minutes of half-assed listening to you whine about your problems, and then prescription after prescription for drugs your psychiatrist/analyst gets paid commission on by Big Pharma, or didn’t you know that, you who know all, but can’t wipe your own ass without a support system?

    Corporate capitalism is, and always been, a pyramid scheme, like Amway and the like: the few, at the top, who control the whole system and wealth, allow a few below them to succeed, so the poor peons, at the bottom, will continue to play the game they can never win (The Merican Dream). Free enterprise is a wonderful thing, but capitalism is a an elite-pig monster that needs to be destroyed, just like every other ism out there, including socialism and communism. If humanity weren’t so divided, people who were suffering wouldn’t need a system like socialism, which is all about reigning and control, just like the rest, people suffering would be taken care of by others. If it’s of wealthy and powerful man, and we the people supposedly need it, then it is a con, a scam and nothing more! Wake up!

    Also, AA/NA (’12 step’) is worthless as teats on a nun. This mind-control system does not work. AA/NA simply amounts to this: another pig-run religion that humanity does not need. You, whoever you are, amount to a dupe, a sucker, a patsy, a sheep to the slaughter. And I advise you to awaken from your religiosity and blind obedience to an evil system, like Corporatism, and grow the hell up. Learn how to take responsibility for your own screw-ups in life, just like the rest of us must do. You’re not so god-damn special that you shouldn’t have to suffer a little in this life, just like the rest of us, so get over yourself!

    And please respond to me. I’m in a lousy mood and would love to rip you a new ass a little bit longer. Oh, and if you are a paid stooge of the pig, then eat shit and die, NOW! Now go your way, little, sad sheep, and bleat all the way back to your buddies at AA/NA and complain to them, and your analyst as well, about me.

    This is for Shelby:

    This person could also be a government shit-stirrer, Shelby. Perhaps this piece of shit government is following the U.K.’s despotic ways, and now has an army of on-line jerks to cause misinformation to be passed around, leading to what the elite-pigs hope will be chaos among the truth-tellers and whistle-blowers. Or this sad person is for real and delusional as hell. Whoever it is, I am concerned for their sanity, because they sound like a televangelist, trying to sell something that people, with a functioning mind, would never buy!

    “Don’t go changin’ to try and please us…” Shelby! Sorry, it’s that musician in me.

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    • Sojourner, you knocked that one out of the ballpark and you hit a homerun! OUCH!! That’s gotta hurt but then again, automatons don’t feel a thing especially if they’ve been in several 12-step programs and been brainwashed and reprogrammed to shrug off the suffering of others. As if I could ever do that. I tend to call out bullshit and then proceed to shrug it off.

      The reason I posted this is just to show that when people don’t want to feel or they want to ignore what is going on around them, then they know exactly where to go and what to do to get it done. Go to seek group counseling because you’ve got a problem and there is a ‘fix’ for it. There are sessions on a therapeutic couch, just as you say Sojourner as well as big pharma meds that’ll get pushed at you by those poison pill pushers that’ll fuck you up even more by the time they’ve finished with you, you won’t even know who you ever were. Yeah, I fucking wanna be just like that! When I hear of an atrocity that occurred, I don’t want to ‘feel’ anything about it or about who got torn to bits, I just need to understand that it’s all part of a system and that the sooner I get with the program that the pill pushers guide me into, I’ll be right as rain in no time flat!

      To hell with that shit! I’ll take ‘personality issues’ for $200 “Alex” Trebek!

      I sincerely appreciate you going the fuck off on my behalf and on behalf of all of us that care and are concerned and who have personality issues because of the fact of our caring and because we are loving, kind, warm and concerned about people and animals as opposed to things. I guess people like me just can’t grasp the reality that nothing’s ever going to change no matter how much we rant, rave and rail against the set-up. But like 2pac said, “I got to keep my head up, even though I’m fed up!”

      So, know that I also appreciate the time you spend reading my rants and raves even though you are as aware as I am that, we are all just pissing in the wind. But, I’d rather keep at it and if by some small minute chance that piss strikes Obama in the face, all the better. If by chance that piss strikes Dick Cheney in the face, all the more better. Of course I know better, but hey! I’m a lunatic that refuses to seek treatment for it, so what can you expect from me, eh?

      Thank you much Sojourner! Thank you much!!! And don’t even think that I am going to change who I am, not ever!!

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  4. Shelby. AGAIN you have misunderstood EVERYTHING! You see, you don’t get capitalism! So let Tubularsock clear this up for you. Your means of production (your rants) are entirely privately owned (by you) BUT they are NOT operated for profit. See to be a good capitalist YOU HAVE TO SELL your work. By giving your rants away you are one of those fucking socialist types! Get it?

    You see a good capitalist can see that things may not change around us according to our desires unless we stay true to our desires which is to profit on EVERYTHING. Now do you see? So the
    solution is investing in BOMBS AND BODY BAGS! And thereby your desires have changed into the oppression of others for your personal gain. Can it get better than THAT?

    So for 5 bucks, Tubularsock will show you what he means.

    Oh money dear friend
    where will it end

    enough in my pocket
    just so I can lock it

    And rich I will be
    in multiplies of three

    And the destitute en mass
    I care not for their ass

    It’s mine that I care for
    It’s mine I adore

    Send Tubularsock, in small unmarked bills, his 5 bucks to:

    Tubularsock’s Twelve Steps To Capitalism Home Course

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    • CAPTAIN, MY CAPTAIN!! I am standing on my chair and filled with goose bumps and tears.

      I have seen the light, Oh My Captain! And I will turn from the ways of socialism and become a money-consumed capitalist and live life ever-after in peace and harmony with the god of Wall Street, Washington D.C., The Vatican and The City of London. Praise, Rothschild, I have been healed! The pennies have fallen from my eyes and been replaced with gold dollars. I can suddenly see the derivatives, I think?

      Your five dollars are on the way, and I can’t wait to take your course, My Captain!

      P.S.

      If I take your course, can I get a break on that truck you’re selling? Just thinking the right way, like a capitalist 12 stepper, or at least trying to!

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      • Ain’t he a riot!!! ROTFLMAO!!! Tubularsock could make the devil laugh. Not that I’d want him to go to the devil! Tube, you know I love you. What I can’t understand is why your posts aren’t showing up on my tracker and in my email. I gotta check on that!!

        What’s this about a truck? Tube’s got a truck for sale? I need a vehicle and Tube knows I do ’cause of my recent accident. I’m off to check this vehicle out! BRB!

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    • So, let me get this straight! I am a goddamn no-account SOCIALIST? Gee fucking whiz!!! I am a sensitive, insane, hysterical, leftie, socialist! Goddamn AGAIN!!! What the fuck?!! Oh hell! The head shrinkers club would love to get their grubby paws on me. Big pharma can just hear the cha-ching of that poison pill cash register ringing daily while they continue to spit out those magic happy pills for me to take and ‘zombiefry’ my ass and have me headed back and forth to Head Shrinkers Are Us and Group Therapy for the Sentimental Leftie Socialists.

      That was fucking hilarious Tube! You always know how to bring me out of the doldrums. If you had been my economics instructor, I would have stayed awake and not snoozed in class. So, by George, I think I’ve got what capitalism is ALL about. So, I must start selling my rants and raves and stop giving them away for free because I am not making any money off of them. I should not do anything purely for the pleasure of doing it. Everything MUST be done in order to get a profit from it and by my not doing this, I am a GASP, socialist! Well fucking send me to the goddamn head of the class, already, willya?!! I done gradumacated with honors and some more shit! I gets the blue ribbon prize for knowing ALL things of capitalism.

      Tube, I am inserting several small bills inside an envelope and I am mailing them to:

      The Top Floor Corner Office of the Underground Bunker Overlooking Washington, DC from Oakland, CA 90230!

      I consider those 5 bucks to be extremely well spent!!!! Thanks to Tubularsock’s Twelve Steps To Capitalism Home Course!

      I encourage anyone that fits the category of a sensitive, insane, hysterical, leftie socialist that doesn’t understand capitalism to send several unmarked small bills to the above address. Again, it will be money well spent!! And we will be participating in CAPITALISM!! Because Tube ain’t doing it for free. He ain’t a ‘socialist’! LMAO!! I fucking love it!

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  5. ‘To hell with that shit! I’ll take ‘personality issues’ for $200 “Alex” Trebek!’ LMAO. Love it!!!

    As another wrote, above, I AM A LUNATIC, ALSO, AND ALWAYS HAVE BEEN, Shelby. But I would rather be a raving lunatic than a calm and peaceful sheep to the slaughter. MLK, Jr., Ghandi and others had the right idea, but, I believe, it was at the wrong time. I believe there will have to be a world war one, not three; I say one, because this war will have to be waged by a collective humanity, or at least a large portion of humanity. Because what needs to be changed is the whole fucking picture, the entire fucking routine in this world! If not, then the cancer ( the insane powerful few ruling over the disenfranchised many) will continue to grow back, as it has for thousands of years. We the people of this world, all of us, need to take back this planet we live on and our lives that have been given us by some thing beyond us! God damn it, I am sick of this shit, and passive resistance is not going to work, because there will always be a ‘lone, paid-off assassin’ waiting to kill the SINGULAR leader of this or that movement. Peace and life in abundance must be set aside until the hard work is accomplished. And the hard work is destroying what has been, completely, and beginning anew.

    If I’m pissing in the wind, then, like you, my friend and sister, I am going to keep pissing in the wind until I am no more, “Rejoice! Rejoice! We have no choice but to carry on!” (CSN & Y)

    “I got to keep my head up, even though I’m fed up!” Here I am wanting to hug 2pac, who, lucky for him, no longer resides in this hell-hole. This describes my state of mind perfectly!

    I guess we just gotta keep on keepin’ on, right?

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    • Well, you know I ain’t all calm and peaceful like Sojourner. That’ll never happen, It just ain’t in me to be calm and peaceful. I’m a hell raiser and proud of it! And I make no bones about it either! They can call me whatever the hell they want because it ain’t what they call me, it’s what I answer to and I answer to ME! To hell with that shit!

      And the comment at the top of the blog that started all of this is available for public viewing on another blog, I’m just not posting the blog name here because I don’t want to drag the blogger into this but at the same time, I was not going to let that comment go without a rebuttal. There is more than one way to skin a cat. And I know several because I’ve been skinning cats for quite a few years, only they weren’t of the 4-legged variety, if ya know what I mean. *wink* *wink*

      And it’s all good than a motherfucker, now that I’ve had MY say! So, ya! We is gonna keep on keeping on! Bu-leee-dat!!!

      Thanks Sojourner! You DA man!!! You and Tube, of course!

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      • Tube is my hero, as well as my Captain, ’cause he be cool and calm, unlike sojourner, who is all tied up in big knots! BTW, Tube has a picture of the truck for sale on his latest post, it needs a ‘few minor’ repairs, however!!! You might say it’s da bomb;-)

        I da man, he da man, we da man,
        I da ho, he da ho, we da ho

        I da ho is a state, ain’t it?

        How about this lesson in language.

        Like you, Kiddo, I can be all screwed up and Tubularsock can bring me right out of it, He’s my Captain! We should be paying him not only for 12 step Capitalism lessons but therapy as well!

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    • I wish I could make this much sense in two short sentences!

      ‘Motive Power.’ That’s it, isn’t it. Shelby has a motive (love, concern, righteous anger and a desire to see things changed), and that is why what she writes is so effective and affective for the rest of us!

      Liked by 1 person

      • *blushing*

        Sojourner has put Shelby to the blush! Me and my maidenly blushes tell on me every time!

        Oh and Sojourner, it was Tube’s posts that weren’t showing up on my tracker. I think that when I made some adjustments to this here blog of mine, I must have inadvertently clicked something that I shouldn’t have because several blogs that were showing up, stopped showing up. I got some type of ‘error’ message from WordPress that I had never seen before and the other night, my computer just completely malfunctioned, again.

        At this point, I can’t tell if it’s my internet service provider or if it’s some shit stirring taking place with regards to hackers or the NSA or what. With so much shit going on, it’s hard to tell what’s going down. But I certainly hope that if someone’s trying to shut my shit down AGAIN, that they do understand that I have backup waiting in the wings. Just so they know!

        Thanks Sojourner!

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  6. “It is unlikely that you will be able to change capitalism but if you understand what it is and how it works, I promise you that your desires will have changed.”…I once came across the Serenity prayer but reworded…to change the things I cannot accept. My desires have indeed changed as I have come to understand “what it is and how it works”. The more I learn the more I want to tear it down. How can you reform a system that has always primarily benefitted an increasingly shrinking few? Maybe you can send your commenter over to Systemic Disorder’s blog. 😉

    Perhaps sentimental but never a fool, Shelby.

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    • “..to change the things I cannot accept”

      Now, THAT, I can get behind! Jeff, as you always say, “every voice counts and every voice is needed.” We may not be able to get anything done on our own but there is power in numbers and not saying that I am one of them, but it has been known throughout history that one person has made a difference if by only inspiring others. I’ll never just abandon my poetry and my rants just because those I rail against don’t hear me. If those who went before us thought that they should just give up because there was no one to ‘hear’ them that could do a damn thing about anything, I’d still be bent over fields of cotton, I’d still not have the right to vote, I’d still be looking at a ‘colored only’ water fountain, not only would I not be able to apply to drive the bus, I’d still have to get up and give my seat to a white person and so forth and so on. Hell no! I’m not listen to this shit!

      “The only person who suffers is you, not them. One of the many wise observations in the many varieties of 12 step programs is this one: “We may think we can change the things around us according to our desires, but when a solution does come, we find it was our desires that had changed.”

      I am not the only person that is suffering and that is why I am ‘ranting and raving’ and ‘railing against those that do not hear me’. Once again, I say, it is MY choice to rant and rave and rail even if I am perceived to be a lunatic for doing so. So be it! But I shall continue! And you are right, ‘reform this system’? Not bloody likely. This whole rotten sham needs to be done away with because it only gets worse as each day goes by. More and more people are impoverished while those at the very top of this pyramid scheme continue to hoard the wealth. It is done by design and it must be undone and that means that it must be demolished.

      Jeff, thank you for adding your voice to the conversation. I appreciate the impetus that you guys give me to carry on. Again, thank you!

      Liked by 1 person

  7. I’m a blushing MADE myself;-)

    “They’re coming to take us away, aha, they’re coming to take us away…”

    As I told Tubularsock, once, Joke ’em, if they can’t take a fuck!

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    • You and Tube should take the show on the road! You guys are hilarious!

      Oh and I should mention that when I was over on Tube’s blog, he said that I could not buy the vehicle(if you can still call it that)that he has for sale because you’ve already bid on it and so I told Tube that it’s, “SOLD to Sojourner!” LMAO! Go claim your prize!! LOL!

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      • Oh boy! Just what I always wanted! But the one drawback, and there is truly only one, according to Tube, is that it comes with no ‘WARranty’!

        Get it, WAR-ranty? If Tube and I went on the road, we would both starve!

        Liked by 1 person

      • Oh, you must not have read my comment on Tube’s blog because I noticed that WARranty situation. I laughed uproariously over the comments over there!

        And no, you guys wouldn’t starve, you’d make millions. Tube would love that since he loves ALL things relative to capitalism. He never misses a Black Friday. And he is already out shopping for next Christmas! He owns so many businesses, I don’t know how he can keep up with them. The man invented ‘capitalism’! Is it an wonder that he can teach a course on it? LMAO!!

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    • Maybe they did mean well, newsfortherevolution and that is why I think that I handled this with the ‘kid glove’ treatment instead of my usual ‘cussing up a shit storm’. I can play nice. *smile*

      I will continue to rant! Count on it!

      And thank you for the encouragement to do so, much appreciated as I am sure you know!

      Liked by 1 person

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