Wal-Mart’s Shit Is Backed UP!

walmart

Wal-Mart has flung so much shit at customers and employees that when both threw the shit back at Wal-Mart, the piles of shit and bullshit caused massive plumbing problems that were felt in Wal-Mart stores from California, Texas, Oklahoma and as far away as Florida and the shit abruptly closed five Wal-Mart stores.

Employees were notified via a shitty letter from Wal-Mart’s corporate office that the stores were too knee-deep in bullshit and shit to remain open. Employees are aghast, not only over the stench but over the fact that Wal-Mart may in fact be lying as to why the shit hit the fan resulting in closed stores. Employees should know that ‘corporations NEVER lie! They just ‘shy’ away from the truth. It is not the same thing. *wink* *wink*

 

Word on the street is that Wal-Mart employees have been staging sit-ins for a living wage and that Wal-Mart’s official word is, “To hell with THAT shit!” “Close the goddamn stores and hang a ‘toilet is out-of-order sign on the goddamn door, NOW!” Something stinky this way comes. I suspect foul play because when the shit hits the fan, everybody should know to duck!

 

Employees of Wal-Mart lined up at Motel 12 to await further instructions from Wal-Mart management on the plight of the plumbing unknown bottom line corporate profits problems. Wal-Mart has assured all 4 full-time employees that they will be transferred to other Wal-Mart stores in Bangladesh and Madagascar. They must, however, pay their own travel costs and other expenses related to relocation. Thousands of part-time employees are on their own. Never has this much shit been known to close 5 stores in 4 states. Simultaneous massive plumbing problems of this magnitude are off the Richter scale! Even California is shocked and they are used to shitshock waves!

 

Seriously? How in the hell does Wal-Mart get away with closing 5 stores, simultaneously in 4 states and state that it is due to plumbing problems? According to reports, there have been no requests for permits for plumbing issues at any of the 5 closed Wal-Mart stores. The stores will be closed for at least 6 months. Also, at least, 2,200 workers are affected by the closures and at the Pico Rivera, CA Wal-Mart; the employees had staged a Black Friday protest over wages. And let us not forget that this was not such a jolly season for retail stores and they have been reeling ever since despite the bull roaring on Wall Street as we all know that that is just a magic act of smoke and mirrors and no substance.

 

Was it only a couple of months ago that Radio Shack filed for bankruptcy and most of those stores will close? JC Penny is barely holding on as is Sears and Kmart. I cannot wait to see how the government is going to skew the employment figures in the coming months and how economists are going to downplay Wal-Mart’s bullshit plumbing problems. Plumbing problems, my ass and pun intended!

“In Midland, Texas, where another store was closed, a plumbing inspector was turned away when he visited the store and offered to help secure construction permits.”

Does that sound like Wal-Mart has a ‘plumbing’ problem?

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Move Over Thanksgiving Day!

shopping

I thought that I would be sad,
when I lost all that I had.
But I’m not shopping mad,
and for that I’m so damn glad.

Look at all those gifts we give.
For material things, that’s why we live.
We say we hate, but we forgive,
every corporate executive.

When is capitalism a crime
if I’m down to my last dime?
My credit gives me time,
but out of debt, will I ever climb?

Move over Thanksgiving Day!
Get it past and out of the way!
I need a shopping holiday.
‘Cause “giving thanks” is an old cliché.

Those Indians, what did they know?
Not one was a shopping pro.
That’s why they had to go.
They delivered to capitalism, quite a blow.

Just how thankful should we be,
such as an Iraqi refugee?
Oh, they love you and they love me,
since we came and made them flee.

Those in Ukraine are thankful too.
They’ve got Nazis with a swastika tattoo.
Thanks to that ever so helpful coup,
arranged by the good ole red, white and blue.

Americans are stupid and that’s for sure.
Their hearts don’t beat and their souls ain’t pure.
Compassion and selflessness will never endure.
They can’t be found in a Macy’s brochure.

So, hit the malls and department stores.
They’re selling their wares like strung-out whores.
When the gates open, feet pound the floors.
It never ends, those shopping wars.

You got hacked and now you’re back.
We assure you, we’ve stopped the attack.
Buy everything that’s on this rack.
This time next week, we’re shooting for Black!

Written by,
Shelby I. Courtland
©2014 Shelby I. Courtland

Target Shoppers, I Tried To Warn You!

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http://www.nbcnews.com/technology/massive-target-credit-card-breach-new-step-security-war-hackers-2D11778083

It looks like hackers hit the bulls-eye with the recent unprecedented hack of Target credit and debit card information.

Not only was the digital heist huge — up to 40 million consumers might have had their data stolen — but the degree of difficulty indicates another step in the security arms race between criminals and merchants.

The hack affected customers who shopped at U.S. Target retail stores between Black Friday, Nov. 27, and Dec. 15

I told you that those huge HDTVs would still be there in January. You didn’t need all that shit you went out and got slapped, head-butted and kicked over and you thought that that was all you had to worry about. Turns out you were so wrong. Now over 40 million shopping fools have had their credit and debit card information stolen and now they are WHINING because they cannot get through to complain to Target. What do YOU want Target to do? What can they do? You bought into the Black Friday Madness bullshit! You bought into the “let’s have a cashless society” bullshit and now you’re WHINING about the choices that you made. You chose to go out on Black Friday and beyond to indulge in what has now become the NEW and unimproved version of ‘Christmas’. You didn’t think that with the touting of spend, spend, spend until your credit card drops bullshit and then spend some more, that it wouldn’t get the ears and eyes of HACKERS???!!! They wanna buy stuff too, ya know! If you weren’t still snoozing off tryptophan, why should they? The hackers got the Black Friday Madness shoppers by the balls credit cards. HA!!

If you just had to go out and buy a new smartphone, discounted, 50%, ya should’a took C-A-S-H along for the fun! Now, your credit may be adversely affected. You may become a victim of identity theft which could cost you even more penalties in increased interest rates IF you can get another credit card so that you can go out AGAIN for the next Black Friday Madness sale and get hacked AGAIN!!! Please do, you stupid foolish ass, clueless, materialistic drones who do everything you’re told without question. If someone tells you to shop on Black Friday, there ya go! If someone tells you to use your credit/debit card, there ya go. And now that the shit has hit the fan, you want answers. Well…too damn bad! Over 40 million of you want answers and there just ain’t that many folks at Target manning the phone lines because guess what…they’re all at the check-out stations ringing the purchases up of more likeminded asses who are most likely about to join you in whining and complaining that their credit/debit card data has been stolen/hacked. You were not just asking for trouble, you were BEGGING for it and baby you got it!!!

…and this is for the dude with the 50″ inch LCD HDTV, enjoy!, because the headache that you’re gonna get from purchasing that TV is gonna be even bigger than your TV. LMAO!! But to show you guys, ALL 40 million of you that I am in the ‘christmas’ spirit, I am going to leave you with a little pick me up!! Enjoy!!! ROFLMAO!!!!!