Trump says Stormy Daniels sketch is of a ‘nonexistent man’

Well if that is the case, I wonder why Donald Trump is seeking $20 million in damages from Daniels for violating terms of the non-disclosure agreement? Stormy Daniels has stated that she was threatened by a man in a parking lot to keep quiet about a sexual encounter with Donald Trump. If I had sex with Donald Trump, I would not need to be threatened to keep silent about it. I would not want anyone to know, myself included!

U.S. President Donald Trump on Wednesday denied the existence of a man portrayed in a sketch released by porn star Stormy Daniels, who said he warned her to stop discussing claims she had a sexual encounter with Trump.

Daniels, whose legal name is Stephanie Clifford, says she had sex with Trump in 2006 and is fighting a 2016 non-disclosure agreement arranged by Trump’s personal attorney, in which she was paid $130,000 to keep silent.

Here is a sketch of the man! The manager of a Philadelphia Starbucks found him and should claim the $131,000 reward that Daniels’ and her attorney offered as an incentive for finding what Trump has stated is a ‘nonexistent man.’ First, the sketch that prompted her to realize who this man was when he asked to use the restroom.

As usual, the BIG, SCARY BLACK MAN did it!

Now, here is the actual perpetrator of this most heinous act of attempting to reduce little ole porn star, Stormy Daniels, to silence about sex with America’s Draft-Dodger-In-Chief, Donald J. Trump.

“That’s him, officer! He’s here in my Starbucks in Philadelphia! Arrest THAT man!”

This is why the manager of a Philadelphia Starbucks called the cops because she had seen the sketch released by Stormy Daniels and her attorney and lo and behold, in walks the BIG, scary, lean, but fit  guy  depicted in the sketch and this guy ‘fit’ the very profile of ‘lean, but fit’ and terrifying.  And he had the audacity to ask to use the restroom, probably to try to re-conceal his identity since the sketch was released. But he is the one who attempted to intimidate Stormy Daniels into remaining silent about her alleged sexual encounter with Twitter-In-Chief, Donald J. Trump.

The hair was the same. The scruffy, unkempt beard was used to disguise distinguishing marks of any kind, such as tattoos or birthmarks that porn star, Stormy Daniels, might recognize . We can stop blaming this incident on ‘racial bias’ because the Starbucks employee was only doing her civic duty by calling the police on a suspected bully and we ALL know that bullying is a pet project of First ‘tramp’, Melania Trump, who when asked about how she reacted when she first heard the news that this ‘non-existent’ man had been arrested, she stated, “DEES and DAT!”

And now that this matter has been cleared up, the real reason why the Starbucks employee called the cops on this man, there is no need whatsoever to close 8,000  Starbucks  locations for ONE WHOLE AFTERNOON to focus on ‘racial bias’ training.

Starbucks did not say how many hours the stores would be shuttered on May 29, but the afternoon is the slowest time for Starbucks’ business.

Also, Shares in Starbucks closed UP 0.7 percent at $59.83 on Tuesday and are relatively unchanged in the week since the arrests. 

Well damn! All that publicity stemming from this arrest has actually been quite good for business. Hell! Starbucks has nothing to complain about because the shareholders are not missing a beat, the CEO still sits on his lofty perch and America’s caffeine addicted can no more miss out on their caffeine fix that enables them to rush to jobs they hate, than they can quit those jobs they hate.

All’s well that end’s well. Stormy Daniel’s threatening and menacing stalker allegedly sent by Trump’s hired thugs to silence her has been arrested and Starbucks’ earnings are going into overdrive while Starbucks’ employees at 8,000 locations  get a free afternoon to ‘goof off’. Ain’t America great?