According to statistics, Black women have more abortions than whites and Hispanics and the reasons given are that many Black women are poor and are often uneducated about the use of contraceptives and therefore, make poor decisions.
We all know how pregnancies happen. Insert dick inside vagina and voila, here comes baby or maybe not. There are two parties that are inserted into the mix to make a baby and to continuously blame women for finding themselves pregnant all by their lonesome is ludicrous and then to further blame Black women for aborting their babies at a higher rate than white women and Hispanics is just icing on the cake. Black women can do nothing right no matter how hard we try and you know what statisticians, I don’t give a fuck what you say about Black women and why we have abortions because it takes two to tango.
But I digress, first things first. Since we all know that sex is too pleasurable to be denied, unplanned pregnancies are going to occur. There are no sure fire birth control methods other than abstinence, which ain’t gonna happen, and sterilization, otherwise known as tubal ligation or vasectomies. And please, feel free to enlighten me if you’ve had a vasectomy and still managed to impregnate someone, the same with tubal ligation. Now, when I was in school, we were not taught sex education and my mother was like Beaver Cleaver’s mother, ‘the stork delivered us’ was her take on how babies came to be. I knew nothing of how babies came to be until I became of age to attend the prom. I was then handed a pamphlet that explained the process in clinical detail and was told by my mother that there was no way in hell that I would be attending the prom, only to return home, pregnant. I was told that intimacy between a male and a female was so excruciatingly painful, that death was to be wished for more.
My sisters and I were the most sexually repressed females ever to walk this planet, add into the mixture, the hellfire and brimstone that would be rained down on us by ‘god’ and we were afraid to wear skirts for fear of sperm finding its way into our secret garden. Geefuckingwhiz here! We all wore chastity belts, believe me!
How shocked I was when one of my friends came to me asking me where the clinic was so that she could get birth control pills. I mean, how would I know? Maybe they got delivered by the stork or were inside the drug store right next to the Anacin that my mother took, religiously. But somehow, my friend found out and asked me to drive her to the clinic. Unfortunately, her information was wrong and when I got back home, my mother was telling me that my friend had asked me to come and pick her up. The clinic that she wanted to go to was on the other side of town. She informed me the next day that she had gotten her birth control pills and that she was ready for ‘S-E-X’. Of course, I was wide-eyed with wonder and since I had been indoctrinated into the “you are a bad, bad girl if you have dirty thoughts” religion, I had to try and save her soul. So I commenced to letting her have it but she was having none of it. She had heard that sex was a beautiful thing and she had a boyfriend that was eager to get on with it.
My mother did not suspect that this friend of mine was not ignorant like I was to the ways of the world and so; she let me go off with her one day. She had lined up a guy for me. He was a friend of her boyfriend and a seemingly nice enough fella until when we were at the park, he pulled out what I soon found to be a joint and they proceeded to smoke it. I was appalled. I just knew that mother could see all of this and I knew ‘god’ was looking. I demanded to be taken home and I was. Unfortunately, the guy had fallen for me, they always do, and my friend invited me over her boyfriend’s house and there he was. This time, the straw that broke the camel’s back was that they insisted on playing a GASP, sex video. As soon as I saw the first naked body, I screeched and stormed out, demanding to be taken home! The guy sent me flowers the next day. And I remember this quite vividly because I was in my room and my baby sister ran into my room shouting that a florist van was parked in front of the house and mother was telling the delivery man that no one had ordered any flowers. He mentioned my name and the flowers were eventually transferred from his hands into my mother’s. When I came downstairs, my mother was all eyes and shrieking about fallen daughters, blah, blah, blah. The card that was addressed to me read, “Shelby, please accept these roses as my apology for hurting your feelings.” Oh, they were beautiful! Twelve long stemmed red roses and of course, my sisters were giggling and having quite the time witnessing the show.
So, what I am trying to say is that back in my day, many of us were so innocent about sex and had no clue. And even though my friend got herself on the pill, not everyone can or will and the only thing that probably saved me from having a ton of babies was the fact that I had been scared shitless at even the thought of S-E-X. Today, even though we are more aware of what goes on between the two sexes at an early age, it still makes no difference because young people are going to experiment and they are going to make mistakes. We all do. Youth is fleeting as we know and to continuously blame people for something that they really cannot control is ridiculous. I realize that having a baby is a big deal. It is another life that has to be taken care of and the care of that life is expensive and when teenagers are having babies, it is especially hard on the entire family because in many Black households, there is no one home to take care of the baby while the teen mother continues with her schooling. And it is so much easier on the male that had a hand in the conception of the child, but will never show the unmistakable signs of carrying a baby, will not be the one who has to nurture the child from infancy to adulthood, unlike the mother. There are many young men, regardless of color that will not step up to the plate and by them not doing so, it is then incumbent upon the female to make a decision as to what to do about an unplanned for pregnancy.
We must stop shaming and blaming particular ethnic groups for what they do or don’t do. We need to be there for our children and support them when they ‘mess up’ and get into situations, whatever they may be and stop making everything about race when it is all about human nature. We are all fallible and not one of us can lay claim to never having made a mistake in our entire life. This nonsense of what one race does to their detriment over another race is counterproductive and useless in the grand scheme of things. No, people are not as naïve as I once was as well as many others, well, maybe not that many, but be that as it may, abortions for whatever reason are I am sure, hard enough as it is to deal with without making it a Black or a white or a Hispanic issue and point the finger and say, “see, those people are always having abortions because of this, this and that. When will they ever learn?” The question is when will we ALL ever learn about humanity and stop the goddamn judging?
Now, my response to that.
I do understand that many people believe that prostitution should be legal since it has been proclaimed as “the oldest profession in the world,” but be that as it may, with what is going down today, what with the ‘incurable clap’, AIDS, herpes, genital warts and the list is endless, continuing to justify prostitution and ALL things of a sexual nature as being fine and dandy is, in my opinion, not the best way to go about empowering people.
Is anybody aware of the statistics of sex workers who are filled with STDs? My cousin went to a doctor’s office in Baltimore, MD and he told me that there was a bulletin board up with multiple vaginas on it, all from Black females, and the vaginas were loaded down with the most horrible stuff he’d ever seen. It was meant to encourage people to take their health seriously and to understand that there are plenty of gross and nasty disease riddled people out there who are just spreading diseases around. I asked him if there was a bulletin board set up showcasing what infected dicks looked like and he said “No.” The concentration seems to be on what the woman’s infected vaginas look like so that men, if they see that nasty looking shit, should steer clear of it.
I would rather starve to death than take up prostitution and believe me, I have starved. Poverty is damn near every American descendant of slaves, birthright. If no one on this planet knows poverty, we do. And when my apartment burned to the ground, I was homeless and walked by two men after having left my burned out shell of an apartment with the few items I could find that hadn’t been burned beyond hope and both looked at me and one said, “I know you’ve got nothing since you’ve just been burned out. How about coming upstairs with us and make a little money?” Their fucking ears are still ringing and that was so long ago, it ain’t even fucking funny! I cussed their damn asses out SO goddamn bad, I blushed! But NEVER did I EVER think so little of myself as to lie back and have some sort of ‘sex’ with strange assholes for something to eat. I’d take myself to a soup kitchen first.
And AGAIN, to state that prostituting oneself is okay if you need to put food on the table for your kids is just what I’ve stated, a cop-out because who is going to put food on the table for the kids when the mother is in the hospital, breathing her last because of complications from AIDS? This shit out there is killing people and to encourage prostitution in this day and age is to give someone a death sentence. This shit ain’t fucking playing with our asses! Who in hell wants to walk around with jelly bumps on their private parts? Who wants cauliflower type shit on their private parts? And if you said, “Yes!” Really?
When I lived in Minnesota, in the public library, I overheard a conversation whereas this woman was telling a man that she HAD genital warts but that she was cured. I’m saying to myself, “Bitch, please! You still got genital warts. There ain’t no cure for THAT shit!” People are seriously deluding themselves if they think that the shit they pick up can be cured with a shot of penicillin.
What I don’t understand is why are we hell bent on making every sex act including sodomy; legitimate, lawful, legal and some more shit? What the fuck is wrong with us? No one has any morals, decency, principles or values any more. That is quite obvious. More’s the goddamn pity!
But hey! If you want to go out there and put your health at risk as a way to feed your kids, go right ahead. If you want to risk your health and that of your unborn child, go right ahead because babies have been born with diseases because the mother received no prenatal care and the baby was born, fucked up. Go ahead and make every excuse in the book as to why prostitution should be legalized on a nationwide level. We are already about to legalize weed on a national level and so we can all just cough our lungs out while burning something awful in our private parts and die happily ever after. Sound good? Of course it does because that is what everyone besides me wants!